Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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