On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
my poor anus
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Randomize
