Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Im part way to drunk.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
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