she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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