oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Randomize
