I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
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