I didn't shave. On purpose
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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