We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
id be glad to
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Randomize
