you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize
