You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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