It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
Randomize