my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
