I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize
