dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
