piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
He kissed a someone with a penis
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Randomize
