i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
