I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
I wish I only lived at night.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Randomize
