Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Randomize
