so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
