Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize
