question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Randomize
