HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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