Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
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