Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Drunk in a bar in Texas. The 24 y/o hottie I am chatting up just called me a male cougar. I am dealing with this whole turning 40 thing juuuust fine.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
I wear drunk well.
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
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