are you still at the devil's house?
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
Randomize