i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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