ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
