i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Randomize
