he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
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