If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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