I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize