I want to stick my p in your. b.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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