So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
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