Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Randomize
