Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
I hope mine doesn't look like that
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Randomize