We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize
