Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
