My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
No I am not eating basil off your cock
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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