i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Randomize
