sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
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