Pants 0. Shit 1.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
