He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I could make wine with my vomit
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
