why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
