At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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