Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
Drake has all the answers
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Randomize
