I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Randomize
