Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
Randomize
