And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
