I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
I need a burrito and a hug.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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