508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
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